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My cat Ulu is more like my daughter than a cat. I recently got divorced, and she was our only "child". About five months after moving out I found a kitten, about 6 months old. I have had Bessie now for four months. Ulu still hisses at her, and sometimes attacks her. When I got Bessie, I tried not to make any changes to Ulu and my relationship. I would still bring her to bed every night and treat her just the same. In fact, when Bessie was around, I didn’t really pay any attention to her if Ulu was there. Ulu seems to absolutely hate me now. She is an indoor/outdoor cat, Bessie is an indoor cat. When she is outside, she is usually ok, she still will hiss and growl at me sometimes, but the second she comes inside, she hisses and growls at both Bessie and I. There are times when Ulu will sleep on the bed with Bessie right there, and there are other times when Ulu seems to have lost her mind with anger. I don’t know what to do. Ulu is my best friend, she means the world to me, but I can’t bring myself to find Bessie another home, she is a part of my heart as well. I have tried to talk to Ulu, tried to just hold her and make her understand that I still love her very much, but she just seems to hate me. I will take her for car rides so we can be alone (she loves to ride in the car) but as soon as we get home, she goes right back to being angry. Ulu is about 6 years old. I got her when she was about one. She has moved several times and adjusts very well to new surroundings. I don’t think our move has stressed her out, I think it is Bessie. I just don’t know what to do, she isn’t getting any better. If anyone has any advice I would really appreciate it. Thank you.
Hi Ulu’s Mama! Regarding Ulu and Bessie. Before you brought Bessie home, did you tell Ulu that she would have a new friend? I know that sounds strange, but cats and dogs are like little furry 4 year olds and they do understand. Ulu probably feels that she is no longer loved and you want someone else. She also considers you, part of her family. She may just be putting Bessie in her place & warning her not to take over the house or you. When you brought Bessie home, did you put her in a cat playpen or medium dog crate with blanket, litter pan, food & water? This way, Ulu could slowly get to know her. I did that with each cat I brought home. It does help. You can still purchase a cat playpen or medium size dog crate, and when Ulu throws a ‘temper tantrum’ ; I would wisk her up & tell her she is going to be put into the ‘time out cage’ or ‘bad kitty cage’ for about an hour. Now Bessie gets to come to the cage & investigate Ulu. If they were both Indoor Only cats, it might fare better, in time and also with the cage, patience, love and adjustment on everyone’s part. I am afraid that if you continue to let Ulu go outside, she may take off. Because she is upset that you brought home a new friend, without preparing her for it. That is good that you spend extra special time with Ulu: car rides, more attention, etc. Also, now that you have Bessie, please do not give her away. She will then feel rejection, and may make it bad for the next owners. Please just give it time, love, patience; continue to talk to Ulu; also talk to Bessie to let her know why Ulu is so angry, and that she is not being rejected by you. Again, I know this sounds strange, but I feel that it does work! Have you asked your veterinarian or any close cat loving friends, family members, what they would do? Also, two of the websites that I know where you can also ask questions, is: PetsMart & Petco. Also, on another Pet Chat Site, is a veterinarian: Dr. Roger L. Welton, his web address is: http:/www.askdvm.com Perhaps you can also ask him what he would suggest. Please keep me informed of their progress. I will keep the 3 of you in my prayers.
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