when will it stop hurting so much

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This topic contains 26 replies, has 0 voices, and was last updated by  Dan 5 years, 6 months ago.

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  • #493549

    ana
    Member

    i lost my beloved doggie frosty a month ago on friday. he was 15 years old and had been my baby for 12 years. we were constantly together along with his other 2 doggie brothers who miss him very much . believe it or not they know he is gone. we were always together slept on the bed with my husband and i and we never went on a vacation that did not accept dogs. our doggies are a big part of our lives. now the circle is broken by frostys death. he was so healthy even for his age. his illness was sudden (mercifully for him) very unexpected for us and heartbreaking . i know the other 2 doggies need me as much or more than ever but i am grieving so much for frosty i cant stop crying. i wish someone would tell me if this pain will ever go away so i can give the other two doggie babies the love they have always known. it seems i am dead inside and have nothing to offer them

    #493550

    Rachel
    Member

    I’m going through something similar. I believe that when your grief begins to subside a little, you will have more to offer your living pets. It might hurt for awhile. I think it’s healthy to talk about it, maybe frame a photo or write in a journal, there are also several pet loss hotlines you can call for support. Embrace your feelings for your lost pet. What you’re going through is natural and very normal. I really feel for you. It’s such a personal thing. I wish I could say more.

    #493551

    Julie
    Member

    Ana,
    I am very sorry for your loss. The previous poster had very good suggestions. Know that you are not alone.
    Julie

    #493552

    John
    Member

    My heart goes out ot you, only those who are truly animal lovers can understand the pain you are going thru, trust that it will get better with time and take solace in the fact that Frosty had the best possible life he could have, dogs and cats have such short lives and I am sure Frosty enjoyed every bit of his.
    "Cast your burden upon the Lord and he shall sustain thee"

    #493553

    Catherine
    Member

    I am sorry for your loss. I know it doesn’t feel like it right now but the pain with subside in time. I have lost several of my babies in the past 5 years. It felt at times like i didn’t have time to grieve for one before i lost another. But my heart was able to heal and so will yours. You will never stop missing or loving him and he will always be in your heart.

    #493554

    Lindsey
    Member

    I feel your pain and cry just reading what you have written. I lost my dog a couple of years ago and it never stopped hurting all together. I will always miss him, and I am glad. I know I can never forget the incredible bond we shared and no dog needs to take his place. I moved on though and have three dogs now that I love very much. I know Marley would want me to always have lots of dogs and share the loved he enjoyed so much. The vet sent me this poem though after Marley died and it has helped me greatly so I wanted to share it with you:
    Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.
    When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
    There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
    There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.
    All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
    The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.
    They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.
    You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.
    Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together….
    Author unknown
    I hope this helps you like it has me. Don’t rush things though because you need to time to heal. It never happens overnight. When you feel like you can stop crying though do not feel bad or guilty about it. It is okay. Your baby you have lost would not want you to cry forever. He would want to you smile and be happy the way you were when you were with him.

    #493555

    Frances
    Member

    Oh, I’m so sorry. I’ve been there.
    I know it hurts, it may hurt for awhile yet.
    I remember how I felt when my cat Fred died suddenly. And we lost our Minerva about 7 months ago. She was 17 & pretty well, but when she had to have her teeth cleaned it pushed her system over the edge & she died suddenly after that – everything stopped working right.
    My husband still tears up at odd times – Minerva was HIS cat, and he loved her so much.
    Now, this I firmly, totally believe: there is a Dog (and Cat) Heaven.
    Take comfort in the thought that he’s there, where the weather is always warm & sunny, fires burn in fireplaces on cool nights, the beds & chairs are comfy, the food is the best, & he has other dogs & animals & people to romp & play with. There’s people up there who are playing fetch with him & scratching his ears until you arrive to take over. He’s young again & can run for miles & never get tired, and chase heavenly bunnies & squirrels (not real ones, but he doesn’t know that).
    And I guarantee, he’ll meet you just inside the gates, bouncing around & barking & whining at you to hurry up and come with him to the wonderful place for you and he (and all your other pets) are going to live together forever.

    #493556

    Brenda
    Member

    so sorry for your loss. I have a petsitting business and i get very attached to all the pets and my clients. It is very heartbreaking. I will pray for you to have strength to carrry on for the sake of your other babies. Brenda

    #493557

    Nicole
    Member

    Thank you for the feedback to my story. I’m very sorry for your loss, and I’m happy that your dog did not have to suffer. And always remember that he is at peace, and he is okay. I’m sure you miss him dearly, and another dog could never replace Frosty. But make sure you don’t take for granted the time you have with your other dogs, who I’m sure you love just as much. The pain will subside over time… but it’s a slow healing wound. Again I’m very sorry, many know how heart wrenching it is to lose such a loving and loyal companion.

    #493558

    Pepe
    Member

    i suggest something like yoga… When my dog jack died, yoga really helped me work through the day and bring peace and release into my life. I was surprised to find that yoga really helps with painful emotions we store in our body.

    #493559

    suzanne
    Member

    I cried when I read your post. you will never get over it,… but soon the crying won’t be as often. Not because you’re forgetting about your friend, but because you will be remembering . You won’t have any bad memories, just remember the silly things and the little everyday habits. I think of my Punkin (1991-2008) EVERY single day. I believe, because I need to believe that he is still lingering here in spirit. But the grieving will never go away. It will change from crying to smiling when you think about your beloved. I quit my daily crying after about 3mo. I still cry ocassionally, but mostly with a smile. su

    #493560

    Joella
    Member

    I feel for you friend. I had to put my little dog of 15 years down a year ago this January. I found the only thing that helped was to tell myself, just don’t think about it untill later when you will have healed a bit. So, I did that, and now I can think about him. Then I had to put my mom’s dog down just last Tuesday. It brought up all the hurt about Eienstein again. I do believe that all dogs go to heaven and someday we will see them again. I’m not sure it’s theologically correct, but I think if God made dogs for us to love in this world, He will surely have them in heaven. How could it be heaven without dogs? Joella

    #493561

    mary
    Member

    I lost my beloved Holly (G. Shepherd) on 11/22/08, one day before her 13th birthday. She had degenerative myelopathy(DM) and lost control of her back legs. I used wheels to help her walk. I belong to a support group for people who had fur kids with DM. Talking with someone really helps. But the pain is still with me. I feel dead inside, but it is getting better. Tears still flow..I can be at a shopping center, movies, etc and I can’t stop crying. I recently adopted a mixed G. Shepherd, but it is dificult to love her the way I should. Time heals everything. But we have to realize that no one will replace our fur kids that crosssed the bridge and that our living fur kids deserve to be loved. I know when Holly passed, everyone said you will feel better little by little…I didn’t believe them, but it is so true. My heart goes out to you. Take care of your fur kids. Hugs and kisses

    #493562

    Paulette
    Member

    I know how you feel. I just lost my 15 yr old silky less than a week ago and my pom I lost in Oct. The pain is raw. I have lost other pets in the past and the pain seems like it will never go away. Frosty would not want you to grieve, but to go on and smile at at all the good memories you have. Time will ease the pain. Just as I am writing this now, one of my hedgehogs has come into the room and up to my leg, like he knows I need some love. I have no real answer for you, but I do hear you and I do share your pain. Paulette

    #493563

    kaly
    Member

    it never really stops hurting I went throgh almost the same thing with my cat enstien she got diabetes we think well we had three diffrent vets and they all said something diffrent one said she didint have it another said she didnt know and one other said she did we thoght she would be ok so we droped her off at the vet and thats when we lost her I never got to say goodbye sorry about your loss

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